Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Water

Water
Deep blue current pulling me into the depths of the sea,
brisk cold liquid that surrounds me causes my limes to freeze ,
Grasping for air it was difficult to breath, as I am choked by the grasp of the sea.
The ocean cried it's mighty roar, as its waves rises and slams me down.
I sank deeper and deeper unable to rise up.
Unable to breath, my lungs filled with water, as I sunk down why should I bother.
Blue cold liquid flooded my eyes as I am engulfed by the ocean's enormous size.
Spinning in circles, my head starts to ache, I drift farther and farther.
Everything goes black as I close my eyes

1 comment:

  1. my limes to freeze ,
    breath----------watch out for spelling mistakes

    Once again, some very good lines here, but the poem needs to be further developed. I like your use of the colour blue, work with it. You could also develop the sound of the ocean in this poem too.

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